Choosing your partner in life

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Choosing your partner in life is certainly one of the most important decisions you have taken or you will be taking.

So how did you go about or how will you go about looking for your partner in life? Is it a matter of luck or a deliberate choice? Read the rest of this entry »

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BE READY AND WILLING TO LEARN

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The most important and effective type of learning is one that is self-motivated. The knowledge and skills you acquire through education by your choice and effort are yours for life. Nobody can steal them from you. The mastery of a skill or a subject and the wisdom to use it are exquisitely satisfying. Learning is the continuous process of becoming who you are. Every time you learn something new, you change and grow as a person. From your birth to your death, you learn countless skills which you use and perform daily and automatically. You learn to walk, to talk, to read, to think critically, to get along with other people, to be creative, to cook, to drive and to run a business. Learning to make decisions and solve problems are competencies you need to develop throughout your life. Your effectiveness as a human being and your stature as a person have a direct relationship on the number of skills you have mastered and that you use daily in your job and in your life.

The key to work in the future and to remain marketable will be up-to-date skills, knowledge and information. In the next decade, we are going to be swamped by the tidal wave of technology. Nearly half the jobs created will require post-secondary education and computer literacy. For most people just to get a job they want will require between 15 to 20 years of formal education. By contrast, the number of jobs requiring less than a high school education is rapidly declining. Everybody understands the importance of education, training and skill development. If you want to have a good paying job and improve your standard of living, you need to be ready and willing to learn and adapt to the reality of the marketplace. Take full responsibility to seek every opportunity to further your education, to strengthen your areas of weakness through appropriate training and to focus your energy on marketable skills.

The admission of your ignorance is the first step in improving your education. Pretending to have knowledge of a subject is far worse than admitting your ignorance and being willing to learn it. Don’t hesitate to ask questions even at the risk of revealing your ignorance. It’s the best and most direct way of learning and growing. Always start by revealing to your teacher at what level of knowledge or skill you are at. If you want to learn how to use the computer or how to access the internet, admit your ignorance or let your teacher know what level you are at. It is impossible to bypass and shortcut the learning process. Many people are tempted to seek a shortcut to the learning process. Most of the time, this will result in frustration and confusion. If you are just starting to play tennis, it makes no sense for you to start lessons at the advanced level right away. In any area of self-improvement, you have to be willing to take one step at a time, be patient and put in the necessary effort and discipline.

If you did not have, or missed the opportunity for, a good education, you can still learn many things and skills you need to have a meaningful and productive life. Apart from the formal education system, you should also be ready and willing to learn from everyone and anyone. In any interaction, the other person forms part of your current learning experience and vice versa. When you are truly ready the teachers will appear. Reach out and find the right people with the right resources to help you. Prepare yourself and understand that there is no shortcut in the learning process. There is always some room for new input and for improvement. Every person you encounter in your lifetime has the potential to teach you something. If your outlook on life is positive, you will have a high level of readiness to learn and to grow. As a student you know that everyone is in some way your teacher and has something to offer you. Once you are ready and willing, you will find teachers everywhere. A wise teacher leads you to the threshold of your own mind and potential.

If you come upon something which or someone who could show you a better way to live, be ready and willing to learn. Your teacher might be a book, a motivational tape, a magazine article, a friend, a religious leader, a child, a thought that is there accidentally at the right time and place. Sometimes you have to seek the teachers and the resources too. Some of these resources include further education such as vocational courses, workshops, seminars, colleges or universities. You can also acquire and develop new, complex social skills by studying successful role models. It helps to observe and learn from others who are doing what you would like to do or who have qualities that you desire. Be humble so that you can accept and acquire the wisdom and understanding of others. Learn to listen, to evaluate and to use the wisdom, experience and expertise of others. Try to break up complicated concepts and problems into simpler units that you can understand and master. Realize that everyone had to learn from someone else.

Extract from my book: Become your best.

http://www.kintue-fee.com

VOLUNTEER YOUR TIME AND SERVICE

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One of the most rewarding commitments you can make is to volunteer your time and services to your family, your friends, your community, a charity or an organization of your choice. Volunteering is rewarding for everyone who is involved. The minute you choose to volunteer, you set ripples in motion. By helping a person in need, a charitable organization, working for a worthwhile cause, you are giving something back to society. The payoff for you, the volunteer, comes when you do get the warm feeling that you made a difference in someone’s life which means that you have ,in fact, made a difference in your own life.

There is always an abundance of work to be done. Contribute in whatever way you can, beginning where you are and looking for what needs to be done. Give some time and assistance to your fellow man. You decide the amount of time and the kind of service you want to provide. Make an effort to help and serve others in some small way every day. You can experience great joy and a sense of accomplishment in your service to others without having to feel egotistic about it. Being there for others when they need you is one of the most loving choices you can make. You are rewarded by knowing that you are making a difference in your sphere of influence. While you are helping others in need, you are also helping yourself. It is only by caring very much for your life that you will be able to care for the lives of others. By giving the gifts of affection and caring, you will be receiving an abundance of joy, appreciation and love. When you help people better themselves, there is no question that you better yourself along the way.

There is no shortage of volunteer agencies who could use your help. You can help out in seniors’ homes, hospitals, children’s groups, libraries, secular or religious service organizations, community service and charitable organizations. Sometimes the number of organized volunteer groups seems so overwhelming that you might experience some difficulty in making a choice. You may even ask how a single person like yourself can contribute to make a difference. A simple solution is to give some of your time, money and skills to help just one person, a child or a family. You may decide to make up your own projects by yourself or with the help of some friends. Make sure your help is welcomed first and ask how you can be of best help. Do not assume that your actions and interventions are always necessary and are in the best interest of those concerned. When you perform an act of kindness to someone, telling him or her something kind and encouraging, you feel good about it and that should be your sole reward. The receiving person sometimes remembers it for the rest of his or her life. It is not that you would expect the person you helped to have gratitude but very often he or she does. If the recipient of your kindness insists on paying you back, you could ask him or her to return the favour to somebody else.

So go ahead, volunteer your time and skills for the service of others!

Extract from my book: Become your best

http://www.kintue-fee.com

Dealing with self-doubt

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Most of us struggle with self-doubts about whether we can achieve our goals and projects. What makes the difference between success and failure is not whether we have self-doubts, but what we do when the doubts creep in.

What can you do is to go back to these two attributes: Positive Mental Attitude and Health Self-esteem. Accept your thoughts about the self-doubts, and reframe them in a more positive way i.e. as an opportunity to test yourself and your capacity to move forward knowing that there may be obstacles along the way.

Take a step backward and review the specific goal or project that is giving you some concerns. However, be careful not to give yourself an excuse to procrastinate. After a careful re-evaluation, you need to take decisive action, either abandon the project as being unrealistic for the moment, or going ahead facing your doubts and fears squarely.

So take decisive actions, and learn from your mistakes or successes. This will build your self-confidence, and will lead you to a more fulfilled life.

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Stretching beyond your comfort zone

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Building self-confidence requires that you stretch beyond where you have been before. As you do this, your confidence about being able to take on new challenges increases. Self-confidence gives you the ability to set smart goals and to overcome obstacles and fear.

Leaving your comfort zone means moving into unfamiliar terrain and facing uncertainty. You need to transform these fears into focused thinking and action. By taking decisive actions and sometimes even learning from your mistakes, you grow and enhance your confidence.
If you feel stuck in a comfort trap, it’s time to set some new goals. Setting and achieving your goals boosts your confidence and leads you to pursue greater challenges. So go ahead set some smart goals which will stretch your comfort zone. As you start accomplishing them, watch your self-confidence grows.

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Taking time–out to rejuvenate

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Take time-out to rejuvenate

All of us need to take time-out to rejuvenate if we want to lead a successful and fulfilling life. It may be as simple as taking a walk in the park or just lying in the sun. It may be listening to music or reading a book. It may be taking time to meditate or to pray. It may be going to exercise in the gym. It may be slipping into a hot soothing bath after a stressful day. It may be going to the spa for a sauna or massage. It may be having a celebration dinner with your loved ones. It may be more elaborate as taking a two week vacation to a exclusive resort or on a big cruise ship. You may even decide to take one year maternity leave or a sabbatical from your work.
Whenever you feel overwhelmed by the pressures of work and stresses of your personal life, you need to take a break to rejuvenate yourself. In this fast changing environment, you can feel pulled in all directions with different demands. In these tough economic times, it’s very important to look after your well-being, and your physical, emotional and mental health. Taking time-out for yourself gives you the opportunity to refresh, re-energize and rejuvenate so that you are ready again to face the stressful demands from your work and personal life. Taking regular time-out to rejuvenate enables you to thrive as an individual and lead a successful and fulfilling life.
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Creating the life you want

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Creating the life you want

If you are planning for a long trip and vacation, you want to have a road map and look at places you want to visit and stay. A lot of people spend more time planning their annual vacation than they spend planning for their life. Life is a journey too. So you need a road map to get to your destination. Do you have your road map?

Most of us want to live a successful and fulfilled life but we don’t have a well thought-out plan to get there. To create the life you want, you need to ask yourself some important questions, and be willing to take the time to answer them to your satisfaction. What does success and fulfilment mean for you? What matters most to you: family, partner in life, relationships, work/career, health, spirituality, etc? What are your goals and priorities in your life? What are your core values and beliefs?

If you long to live a more authentic successful and fulfilled life, you need to reflect on your values and beliefs. If you live your life in alignment with your core values, beliefs, priorities and goals, the life you are meant to live tends to unfold before your eyes. Once you really understand what do you want out of life, then you can start planning for it. Determine what are the actions you need to take and the changes you need to make to accomplish your goals in life. Your detailed action plans and strategies are an important part of your road maps to success and fulfilment.

Have a positive mental attitude and confidence that you can indeed create the life you want. Along with some successes, there will inevitably be some set-backs. Believe in yourself and persevere. Don’t forget to be grateful for all the small successes along the way, and celebrate them with your loved ones.

Now go create the life you want. If you find this blog helpful, share it with your friends and followers.

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